Juliette Dalrymple, managing director at Family Matters is delighted that Doncaster Central Labour MP and Deputy Speaker of the House of Commons, Dame Rosie Winterton, will visit the firm’s offices on 1st December this year.
Juliette says: “I went to a conference that talked about the launch in Parliament of the report – ‘A Child’s Right to Matter’, which was published in November by the Family Solutions Group. I contacted Dame Rosie to bring it to her attention. Her office then suggested that she come to speak to us to talk about the report and the work we do at Family Matters. We are delighted that she is doing this and will be able to discuss the report with staff working at all stages of mediation, from the team who take the initial calls to the trained and training mediators.”
The report explores the needs of children living in separated families. It asks who in government looks after the needs of these families and where should they go for support when they fall outside families who need private law help and have to apply to court for financial or child issues, or where they are covered by public law when the state intervenes about child protection orders. At present it seems there is nowhere to go – there is no government department that takes responsibility for overseeing the child welfare of separated families. It appears to have been overlooked.
The Family Solutions Group consulted two groups of people. The first was a group of multi-disciplinary professionals. Some of the issues they identified were:
- The needs of children going through a family separation are not recognised.
- Parents aren’t always the best judge of how children are coping.
- Accessible information and support are desperately needed by children.
- The most obvious source of this information and support is a one-stop website and schools.
- Children often feel powerless in parental separation situations, but it is acknowledged that outcomes are generally better when they are consulted – at an appropriate age.
- Support is often only available when the situation becomes extreme, and a child is already distressed.
The second group of people consulted is the UK Youth Parliament. 112 members, aged 11 -18, gave their views, which include:
- Children need to be informed about issues that affect them, such as arrangements for their brothers and sisters, where they will live and how long they will spend with each parent.
- Their feelings of powerlessness and being trapped by other people’s decisions. They want a say in their future, and more than half said they didn’t know they had a right to be consulted.
- A feeling of isolation, being unable to discuss the family separation for fear of it being ‘taboo’.
- Not knowing where to go or who to talk to, generally turning to family members such as grandparents.
- 67% said that teachers did not generally understand their needs in relation to family separation.
- They feel that it is unfair that they have to make the choice between mum and dad.
- Thinking that they have to grow up more quickly than other children as their parents are separated.
Juliette says: “We really appreciate Dame Rosie taking time out of her busy schedule to talk to us and discuss the needs of children from separated families who do not come to the attention of official agencies. They are currently invisible and unheard. Perhaps for the first time, this report sees and hears these children and young people, concluding that the well-being of children and parents in separated families should become the responsibility of the Minister for Children under the Department for Education. Despite the title, this specific responsibility does not currently fall within the minister’s portfolio.
“Dame Rosie has always been supportive of Family Matters as a Doncaster and South Yorkshire business, and we really look forward to meeting her.”
